How is it that every time I put my glasses on at night I find that they’re smudged with finger prints? This is of course a rhetorical question as I’m already at peace with the fact that I’ll never know the answer. I once launched an investigation to see which of my roommates were secretly running into the bathroom and smearing their hands all over my glasses, but all I discovered was 48 hours of boring video footage and the fact that I have too much time on my hands. Oh well, I’ll just take these free Bausch lens cleaning tissues and file this mystery in my box of cold cases.