Freebies and free stuff

EDIT: I think its dead, but sorry for reversing the link and writing…

Like all good freebies, there’s a cycle to when they’re available. Its like the first and third weeks of a month, there’s the pads, then the second and fourth have the creams and tampons. So in that cycle, we have the free Glad ForceFlex trash bag one. Yup, like all good freebies, sometimes they come back.

And its about time too. I’ve needed to take the trash out since the last freebie was available…

As if it weren’t enough that every month there’s another Playtex sport sample, it seems like now you can also demand your free Playtex Sport sample. Yup, not just request it, demand it.

Personally, I don’t know why I’d ever demand a tampon, but that’s probably just a guy thing…

I buy a lot of organic products. Alright, I lie. My wife buys us a lot of organic products. Some of the things, I can’t tell a difference on. I mean, seriously, who cares about organic mac & cheese when the real stuff tastes more like a box?

But now, I try to care a little more, seeing there’s this free Annie’s lunch bag with two UPCs. And thankfully, there happened to be the numbers 013562300983 and 013562302109 sitting around that I recently bought… As if I didn’t have enough lunch boxes…

There’s nothing that I love more than wasting my time playing mindless video games. Oh wait, nevermind, there are plenty of things that I love more: eating, torturing my cats by hanging them upside down and rubbing their bellies, cuddling with my wife on the couch and watching S#!t My Dad Says, heckling political candidates on MSNBC by holding muffins up to my television, and plenty more that I can’t even name because I’m trying to keep it PG.

So for those that just don’t want to presale anything from GameStop to get a chance to play, they can just click right on through and claim their free appetizer at TGIFridays coupon. Saves a lot of time for baking more muffins…

I should really be in bed. After a long day sitting around on vacation and really doing nothing? Man, I don’t know how I go into work and do that everyday. I mean, seriously, I really could just sit here and not have anything to worry about at all. And especially with these free Stayfree samples. They let me spend more time in front of my computer. And they’re a product that I can count on when my samples of Depends run out…

If I’m resorting to jokes about bodily functions? I think I should definitely call it a night…

There’s something about this free Royal Canin discovery box coupon for Petco that when I see the name? I think of a dog. I mean, canin, canine, what’s the real difference other than the most common letter in the alphabet? Sort of like how dog and god are the same thing, just depends on which way you spell it. Still, its not a palindrome, which if you ask me, is even cooler than all of that.

I’d write one here, but I’m still stuck figuring out the name of this product and what animal its for…

I have so many different mailing address labels from one freebie or another that I could fill out my Christmas cards this year and never have to worry about return addressing any envelope. That being said, I still requested these free cancer research mailing address labels. Sure, I’ve got a ton of ones with birds and flowers on them, but another pack with some more variety? Well, variety is just the spice of life…

I have a long relationship with free ear plugs like these being offered by Hearos. My dad was in a rock band during my childhood so I spent quite a bit of time on the road. I routinely ignored the normal perks, like being backstage and groupies, in exchange for making up games like “how many ear plugs can I stick up my nose?” (six) and “can I eat this jar of Reese’s Pieces in under 10 minutes?” (no). I have to say it was a well spent youth.

Make sure to click the verification link they send to your email. Of course, everybody used their freebie email account, right? Right?!

This press release says you can get free Baskin-Robbins Smooth & Creamy Mango Delight hard candy in participating stores, but I suspect it’s just one piece of candy. Would you go out of your way for a little candy? I don’t know about most people, but I sure as heck would. In fact, I’m typing this while I speed down the road to my nearest store!

Seriously though, if you find yourself near a BR, maybe walk in and ask for a sample. Then ask for a sample of a few ice cream flavors and, viola, there’s your lunch.

After any and all jogs, I really feel like a hamburger. Or just something that I can shovel into my mouth and call food. So logically, after this jog with my wife and her trainer? I’m looking for anything and everything that I can forage on around the apartment. I’m like a wild animal.

While I think that this free Dex4 Fast Acting Glucose sample would probably help spike that blood sugar back up for me, somehow I get the feeling that I’d have a little too much energy afterwards…