Freebies and free stuff

Don’t be alarmed. Code BABYISDUEANYDAY will only earn you 5 free Pampers Gifts to Grow points and won’t, as I earlier assumed, automatically send a baby to your doorstep. Those were a few hairy hours this afternoon.

If you’re already a member of Pamper’s site, you can use this link to head straight to the log-in page.

EDIT: I misspelled everything and this is no longer available. Go me!

Costco is offering a free Align Probiotic supplement, which is … I have no idea. And that’s after spending 10 minutes Googling “probiotic.” No matter what link I clicked, I kept ending up at its Wikipedia page for a few minutes before realizing my eyes had glazed over. I’m not even paying attention right now. Am I still typing? I should probably hit the Publish button.

When my wife and I moved into our new apartment, we started to think more about organization and keeping things clean. Sadly, my idea of a suit of armor with the lance holding up all of our toilet paper rolls didn’t fit into the organizational plan.

But methinks that this free Cottonelle toilet paper cover might do the trick. All I needed was the UPC 3600013396, and I think maybe I can tell her that my suit of armor should be holding this cover. Yup, that’s it.

Thanks to everyone who posted this sucker over on the HIF Facebook page. I saw the ad during The Bachelorette’s After The Rose show. I was a J.P. fan, sorry…

These aren’t just sticky notes. These are free Post-it Super Sticky notes! My guess is they used a combination of crazy glue and whatever that sticky black goop under my steering wheel is.

There’s something about me and free pens. I’m still a loyal fan of those Uniball Super Ink pens thanks to their giveaway in 2010. Seriously, those pens are awesome. I sign my name on any contract I can just for an excuse to use the pen. At this point, I’m pretty sure my dog has Power of Attorney over me.

So it shouldn’t come as a surprise that I’m excited over this free BIC Atlantis pen offer on Facebook. But here’s the thing: They’re only giving away 130 pens per hour between 10am and 8pm EST for the next 30 days. That might sound bad, but it comes to 42,900 freebies. So if you miss out today, just mark a random day in the middle of the month and you’ll probably have better luck signing up then.

After liking them on Facebook, you can get free Armani Code cologne. You know what they say though – loose lips sink ships. So don’t sign up for this unless you can keep the Code under wraps. Otherwise HIF’s enemies will … know we smell good? On second thought, I guess that’s not such a bad thing.

Holy bologna, has it really been six weeks since I’ve posted a Freebies Received? It’s been hard to keep track of things. I know I got my Chips Ahoy cookie and the full bottle of Downy Unstpables. There was a Playboy somewhere in there as well. There were a ton of magazines, to be exact. Newspapers too! Luckily I had somebody else collect all my freebies for me and compile them beneath the jump, if you’re so inclined to see what I got.

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First off, wow. The thousands of positive comments and emails that flooded my inbox over the past 72 hours was overwhelming and amazing. You people sure know how to make a guy feel loved. I haven’t read them all yet, but please know that I am slowly and surely doing so! I felt like garbage this weekend, but every time I opened my laptop, I was able to smile thanks to y’all.

So again, thank you! I’m feeling good today and my treatment’s light this week, so hopefully there are plenty of freebies to post. Speaking of which …

Kashi used to be a big player in the freebie scene. They pulled back on the offers about two years ago, which I found curious, but evidently that was so they could pour every available cent into R&D. How do I know this? Because now they have a free Kashi cereal or granola bar offer that gives 10 year old children the ability to morph into the size of an average adult mom. Color me impressed.