Freebies and free stuff

In order to get the Famous Dave’s birthday freebie, you have to … ignore everything I wrote below because I’m an idiot and screwed up the joke and was trying to do 10 things at once. Fun times! Oh, screw it, I’ll leave it in just to show how much of an idiot I can be.

… become a P.I.G. – Pretty Important Pig. But wait, they’re using an acronym for a word in the acronym? Is that even allowed? They’re playing with some dangerous fire here. We’re one slipup away from getting sucked into an infinite loop of Pretty Important Pretty Important Pretty Important ∞ Pig

Signup Freebie: Free dessert with the purchase of an entree.
Birthday Freebie: Free dessert with the purchase of an entree.

Remember, we have a full list of free birthday food!

EDIT: This is no longer available.

For today only, you can get a code on Facebook for a free TinyPrints Halloween greeting card with free shipping if you have it sent to your own house. If you try to ship it elsewhere, you’ll have to pay $.44 for a stamp. That’s always perplexed me. Why is it free to ship something to my house but not others?

While we’re on the subject, since when did Halloween greeting cards become a thing? Not that I’m complaining. I was an instant convert as soon as I saw the “Have a Corny Halloween” card.

I have to thank one of our readers for some wonderful jokes about the city that I call my home. I mean, sure, it rains a lot here in Seattle (actually not that much since I’ve been here, but I don’t want to spoil this joke), but we’re also home to a lot of Costco’s, meaning I could just get this free Kirkland Signature Body Lotion by walking down the road and squirting a few bottles. And all I need is to create any random 12 digit number!

However, because of all of our rain, why would I need to do anything to help moisten my skin any more?

I tried to convince 3 of my fellow managers at work that we should dress up as KISS this year for Halloween. Seriously, how cool would that be? But alas, this free Bare Escentuals lip color coupon for a Sephora inside a JCPenny’s won’t come in handy for me. I guess that means I’ll just have to give it to my wife…

EDIT: I hope all of you had a great lunch!

On Friday, October 7, from 11am-4pm, you can use this coupon to get a free Choose 2 Lunch Combination at Macaroni Grill. It’s dine-in only but unfortunately I don’t have a nearby location. However I’ve vowed to cook macaroni on a grill for lunch this Friday. Should be interesting.

[thanks to everyone who sent this in!]

This free key ring bottle opener is from Philip Morris, so you have to be at least 18 21 years old. Sorry kiddos. After you log in, click the Promotions tab and request the freebie. It’s the perfect gift for that special someone who hasn’t learned how to open a bottle with a door. Or a lighter. Or a spoon. Or pretty much anything within arms reach.

[Thanks to everyone who sent this in!]

Look, I’m no medical professional. The fact that I’ve brushed my teeth with cake frosting multiple times should be proof enough. But I’m still cautioning against using this free Origins Plantscription eye serum via Facebook, because honestly, plants shouldn’t be giving out prescriptions. There, I said it. That’s how I feel and I won’t apologize!

Wow. This Dippin’ Dots birthday freebie is officially the lamest one yet. Who the heck wants to buy some merchandise so they can get a free charm? Whatever. I’m posting this because I’m now down to 45 birthday freebies in my drafts folder and dang it if I don’t want to get these all posted. But I’m going to need some help. Don’t let me slack! If I go a day and forget to post a birthday freebie, remind me! I want my drafts folder to be empty in 45 days and I need y’all to be my enforcers.

Signup Freebie: Nothing.
Birthday Freebie: 10% off an online ice cream order and a free mug or charm with any merchandise offer.

Remember, we have a full list of free birthday food!

Like acid reflux, indigestion, or that neighborhood kid who eggs your door and runs off, it looks like this free Cream of Wheat Cinnabon sample is back again… Unlike that kid, though, I’m sure that this one doesn’t require running after someone with a frying pan and spatula.

I’m all about new music. Its why I had Mayday Parade’s new album on my iPod first thing this morning, and why I can’t wait for the new Marianas Trench as well as Mike Garrigan albums to come out soon too. So when I saw this free NPR World Cafe Mix download? You’d better believe that I agonized over which album I would remove from my iPod to fit in these 20 tracks…