Freebies and free stuff

My cats don’t care about anything, really. We buy them new toys, and they just stare at us. We get them a Drinkwell fountain, and they beg at the sink for water. We buy them wet food, and they just puke all over the living room.

So maybe I can get them to care about something with this free Cats Against Clay poster. Give them a real role model. And maybe, they’ll take on some responsibility and clean their own darn litter box too…

I don’t have any fish to enjoy free Hikari fish food and I’d normally say something like “I’m sure my dogs will eat it!” but not now. They are fat. Huge! It’s diet time for them. It finally hit me when one tried to sit down the other night but instead fell backwards and then flopped onto her side. On a scale of 1 to 10, she’s not allowed on because she’ll break it.

It’s been over a year since we posted this free ASPCA pet safety pack that contains a fridge magnet and window cling to alert firefighters of your pets presence. My old cling isn’t by the door anymore, which leads me to think it peeled off, fell on the floor, and was most likely eaten by one of my dogs.

[thanks Amritawatie!]

If you have a second email address, you might want to sign up for the free Rachael Ray Nutrish dog food offer again. I’ll be honest, I’m not 100% sure this is still available. During my involuntary isolation from the internet, I’m going through the archives and looking for freebies that I guess are still working.

One unexpected bonus of doing so is reading all the random jokes I’ve made throughout the years. If you throw out logic and reason before squinting real hard, a few of them even make sense!

One you log-in or signup for Petsmart’s PetPerks club, go to the coupons section and print out the offer for a free 6 oz. bag of Purina One cat or dog food. Now the question is how many people will make the same mistake I did and print out the “Canada only” coupons as well?

EDIT: This is no longer available.

A freebie like this free Better Than Ears dog treat sample makes me glad I don’t have dogs. I mean, if dogs are eating ears before now and it took them this long to finally make something better than ears? Its a wonder we can still hear!

EDIT: Their sire has crashed.

I don’t know why I’m awake so early after 5 nights in a row closing at work… Oh yeah, that’s right, I’m calling the wife to make sure she’s awake even earlier where she’s at on the west coast…

My cats have the right idea, though. They’re still sleeping, having invaded the warm cubby hole that I’ve created in my bed. So as much as I hate the furry little buggers for still getting to sleep and for the fact that I need to work to bring home the kibble, maybe I’ll just request this free Natura Pet Food coupon for a 5-6lb bag and call out from work today…

No more working for kibble for me!

Sam’s Club has a new free Purina One pet food link up. A membership ID is required, so bust out those Sam’s Club cards! You know, the ones with the nine digit ID number and a little black & white photo of you down in the corner. No, that’s your library card. Stop, stop, that’s a voter registration card. You know, on second though, how about I take that pet off your hands. I’m not sure you’re qualified to look after another living creature.

I kept reading this free Purina One Smart Blend dog food as “South Beach” and wondered how in the world I was supposed to put my dogs on a diet while I’m eating donuts for all six of my daily meals.

Note that you can opt for some free Purina One Fancy Feast cat food instead.

EDIT: This is no longer available.

I am on what may be the slowest Internet connection of all time right now. It took almost 10 minutes to load the page for free Three Dog Bakery oven baked treats from Walmart. Ten minutes! My dogs better give me a freaking foot massage when I get home for that.