Hey, It’s Free!

Fellow Hiffer Mersida sent in this coupon for a pair of free Jockey underwear at Macy’s from May 31-June 6. You can never have too many pairs of underwear!

This free CubeBix.com t-shirt looks kinda neat seeing as how they send you a little package that you then soak in water before it transforms into a t-shirt. See, this is the kind of technology that scientists need to be working on. I want a pill that, once soaked in water, will transform into a new computer or car. Is this really too much to expect?

[via the forums]

Ok, I have a confession to make. I’ve never really had a need for a free neck warmer. There, I’ve said it. I must have an abnormally hot neck or something. Don’t come near me or I’m afraid I’ll scorch you!

This is most likely dead.

1. all of the above
2. a type of lily
3. false
4. all of the above
5. false
6. tequiila
7. George Carlin
8. Partida Tequila

What is all of that above? Well, it’s the answers to this Partida Tequila quiz where you can get a free t-shirt, money clip, necklace or agave drink (whatever the heck that is!) Personally, I went with the t-shirt simply because I don’t know what the drink is, I’m not much of a necklace kinda guy, and I don’t think I’m cool enough to pull off a money clip. Well, that, and I’m like George Costanza and keep way too much stuff in my wallet!

[via the forums]

EDIT: Sorry folks, but this is dead now.

I just finished my final exams for the semester, and I’m walking away decent grades on most of them. And I still ended up with over a 3.0 GPA for the semester, so I can’t complain.

Or can I? See, I just found this free Citizens Bank T-shirt. Yes, I know that link there is to a quiz. But you have to take the quiz first to get the free shirt. And why can I complain? Because its the easiest test in your life. When you get an answer wrong, it tells you the right answer, so just select the right answer!

Man, if only my finals were like that…

[via the forums]

With Goob out of the country, you could say that we’ve really been slacking around the HIF office. I mean, I know he posted a good little blitz of freebees the other day, but for me? I’ve been sitting here and reading so much more than posting. I sit around, I read the updates, but I haven’t actively been searching or coming across anything. I could blame it on the fact that I have a gig coming up this Sunday that I’ve been preparing for and doing recording and rehearsing, or I could blame it on my homework. But, I’ll just say that it’s simply because I’m lazy. Yup. That’s it. Lazy.

Still, finding this free Suburu WRX shirt makes me happy. It reminds me of how the Suburus are really awesome cars and really fun to drive. When I was out in Utah on my honeymoon, its what I rode around in. One set of my in-laws owns two of them, and we got it all mudded up and looking awesome. Ah. Memories.

So, even if you can’t own one, you can always have this shirt and make up your own cool Suburu memories…

And me? I’ll either make up other posts here soon, or I’ll just make up more excuses… Like hunting for the jackalope…

EDIT: And speaking of hunting for that jackalope, this t-shirt appears to have disappeared and be just as gone as that mythical beast… Sorry if you missed it, folks…

[via the forums]

Lubrication. That’s a funny sounding word. I don’t know why, but it just is. It’s also the correct answer you need to select in order to get this free Bosch Tools t-shirt. I actually had a friend who worked at Bosch for a while. Unfortunately, I don’t have a funny story to go along with that little tidbit. Maybe I should make one up, involving a monkey, a lavalamp, and a box of Rolaids. Woo hoo, now I have something to keep myself entertained by on the flight home in a few days!

Sorry for the slow freebie posting recently. I’m still out of the country, folks, and will be so until the 20th of this month at the earliest. But I’m still here looking for freebies for everybody. In fact, I just found this free ContiTech T-shirt that looks kinda cool. That is, if you like the color yellow. I’ve never been a big fan of yellow.

I think it goes back to when I was in kindergarten. I’d draw a huge picture of my house and family standing outside, with trees and clouds and a nice big sun. And yet you could never see the sun, because yellow is so hard to see on paper. Thus began my lifelong hatred of art and yellow.

Edit: Deadage!

No matter how many hats you have, you can never have enough. Well, my wife says otherwise because she finds different hats on different surfaces. But just think about it, you’re not going to go to a Bo Sox game wearing a Yanks cap, would you? Well, maybe if Dr. Kevorkian’s services cost too much you might.

Needless to say, this free hat from Rigid looks pretty cool. The little small picture actually looks decent. Can’t complain on that.

Oh, and all of those things about a “sweepstakes,” well, that’s just for a MLB jersey. So maybe you’ll get a shirt to go with that cap, eh?

One less day to do laundry. Nice.

[via the forums]

The restaurant chain Wendy’s is giving away free t-shirts and food to any college student who signs up. But I’m not even a college student anymore and it still accepted my information.

Basically, just enter in your info plus a college e-mail address (I luckily remembered my old one) then hit submit. That’s it. They didn’t ask me to confirm my address and I fudged the numbers a little to make it look like I was still in college They say they’ll send you a t-shirt and then if you take a picture of yourself wearing it and put that picture in your Myspace page, they’ll send you coupons for free food. Sounds good to me!

[via the forums]

When you talk about getting dressed from head to toe, you could say that I have a head and toe fetish. No, no that type of fetish, silly. I just happen to have a lot of hats and shoes. Seriously. I have 6 pairs of shoes right here in our office in front of me under my computer desk alone. Another 2 in the living room, and another 2 in the bedroom. I think I also have 2 pairs in my closet.

But hats? Oh boy. My favorite ones to wear are Kangol Wool 505’s in black. Think all Samuel Jackson style. Yeah, that’s it. Refined, but cool. And even though this free hat from GatorGear Hats isn’t going to be as cool as that, well, I’m sure I’ll survive. I’ll hang it right next to my Gibson, Aerosmith, SeaWorld, and Adidas baseball caps. Or next to my cowboy hat…

No, that’s not a fetish either. Geez. What’s with you people? We don’t give you a freebee yesterday and you had all day to put your minds in the gutter…

EDIT: We can cap-off this offer as being closed… Dead now.

[via the forums]

Winter’s fast approaching (dang it…) and that means that in the not too distant future, I’m going to have cold ears. I hate it when my ears are cold! Tell me I’m not the only one out there who can’t stand it when his ears are frozen solid. So if you’re like me, you can easily pretend to be a construction worker and get this free beanie hat after answering a few questions. Actually, I worked on my screen door yesterday and the day before that, I fixed a leaky faucet. That’s close enough to being a construction worker for me

[via the forums]

There are three channels that as a man I stay far far away from. Those being Lifetime, Lifetime Movie, and Oxygen. And those who are in the know, know that Womens Entertainment, or WE as they call themselves, isn’t as bad as the others. Hell, they actually play Princess Bride every other week somewhere in their lineup, so there’s a reason to watch it.

Still, there’s just something about the other three that never sits right with me. And amidst those, you have reality shows like the whole “Tori and Dean: Inn Love.” Well, if I just dissed your show, I’m sorry. But here, to make up for it, I have this free “I ♥ McDeany” t-shirt offer that Oxygen happens to have available for folks.

And gentlemen who might have been dissed too? Sorry, I’ve got nothin’. It’s a ladies baby-doll shirt for the show, so unless you rip off the sleeves to turn it into a masculine muscle shirt for the gym, well, you’ll have to wait for my next freebee.

Though, I’m sure that the guy working out next to you would wonder who McDeany is…

EDIT: And an hour after I post this, it’s already dead. I guess a lot of people really love McDeany…

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free, shirt, Oxygen, womens television, gym

I’m sure which I’d prefer: this free Rhino Blades t-shirt or an actual Rhino covered in blades. Think about it. He not only could be your personal body guard, but he’d get your into any club you wanted or let you cut in the front of any line. For who would mess with a giant bladed rhino? A fool, that’s who. A fool who would never live to tell about it and whose spot you took at the front of the line.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free t-shirt, rhinos, blades, freebies

I don’t know about y’all, but I’ve personally been dieing to get a pee colored shirt lately. Think of all the different types of pants you could wear it with! And thankfully, the good folks at Perpster.com are giving away free semi-hideous yellow t-shirts! If anything, it’ll be a great item to force my brother to wear while holding a sign pointing to our yard sale this weekend. People might be able to avoid seeing the sign, but there’s no way they’ll successfully avoid eye contact with this shirt.

[via Froggie]

Technorati Tags: free t-shirts, free clothes, freebies

Having finally finished the latest Harry Potter book (don’t worry, no spoilers will be leaked here), I can get back to my life. I had shunned the Internet, radio, TV, and basically all outside communication with the world in an effort to make sure I wasn’t spoiled to the ending. And now I’m feeling a little lethargic, as I haven’t left my house in about a week now. So I’ve just signed up for these free runners socks and maybe once I get them in a few weeks, I’ll finally venture outside and, you know, take part in this “exercise” stuff I keep hearing about.

[via Froggie]

Technorati Tags: free clothes, socks, running, runners, freebies

I hope this free hat has “Stick Welding” stitched across the front of it, because that sounds like one of those phrases that should be dirty, but isn’t. Like shuttlecock. Or maybe I could get “Solid Wire” on it. That sounds manly and cool, especially when said in an Arnold Schwarzenegger voice.

[via Froggie]

Technorati Tags: free hat, freebies

If you’re a high-school aged individual with no desire whatsoever to join the military, then you might not want to sign up for this free Marines T-Shirt. I remember signing up for something similar back when I was a junior in high school and let’s just say that I soon got on a first name basis with the local Marine recruiter. He used to call all the time, it was like I had a new friend! Then one afternoon, I was playing Final Fantasy 8 and defeated a monster that had been giving me so much trouble recently. I was in such a gay mood after that huge victory, that I couldn’t help but tell everybody how gay I was right then! That evening was the last time I ever talked to him, for he mysteriously stopped calling after that…I’ve never figured out why…

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free t-shirt, marines, military

You know those commercials on TV for Dove deodorant with the black shirts? The ones that either have the girls flipping through crazy obstacles to not get deodorant stains on their clothes or the ones that also have them choose between a sleeveless or sleeved shirt?

Well it looks like, ladies, they’re giving out some free shirts from the Dove 5-day challenge and asking you to try it out too.

The only thing, is that they’re doing it so you can go sleeveless. What if you don’t want to go sleeveless because your shoulders would be cold? Or you have hairy shoulders? Or even worse, your suit doesn’t really have 80’s shoulder pads, that’s just your shoulders?

Well, this free shirt won’t fix that, but I hear that the arena football league needs some more defensive linemen…

Watch this website, it’s experiencing high traffic–apparently, who woulda thunk?–and is a bit unstable. So if it’s down? Check back and it’ll probably come back.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free, shirt, dove, football, shoulders

EDIT: Looks like this is dead now!

I won’t forget when I turned 13 and at my bar mitzvah, being pulled aside by one of my great uncles.

“Adam,” he told me, “You did a fine job, but you tied your tie all wrong!” I looked at him puzzled. I had gone around the bend, then over the back, and through the loop. The front was nice and even, and the back was well hidden behind it. He stopped and told me, then, that while it looked right, the key was matching the ends together even after it was tied. Who would have thought. And I thought it was all in the box knot.

But, with this free After-Six slider neck-tie, you can now forget about even making that box and just line everything up and be good to go. Now all I need are some freebee dress shirts and freebee khakis and I’ll be good to go…

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: tie, bar mitzvah, free, box knot, secret