Freebies and free stuff

It’s easy to complain about calendar freebies that never come, but I feel pretty good about this free Oriental Trading 2010 calendar. Why? Because I’m looking at their 2009 calendar right now! It was one of the few that came last year and I’ve currently got it hanging on my wall. It could honestly double as an “I Spy” book, because each month’s picture is a smorgasbord of little trinkets and goodies. It’s easy to just stare at the image and …

… huh? Where’d the last hour go?

This free Mueller’s Meal Planner comes with 60 recipes and a batch of coupons, but it’s only available in 14 east coast states. That certainly stinks, but it’s the best freebie I can find right now! That was supposed to be a subtle hint to any marketing executives who read HIF, but now that I’ve typed this sentence out, it’s not so subtle anymore. It’s kind of right in their face. It’s almost as if I spray painted “we’d like more freebies, please” onto their monitor.

Be right back, I’m gonna go rummage through the garage for my paint cans.

EDIT: Their site is currently down for maintenance and there’s a chance that this offer won’t be available when it comes back up. The 50 free photo cards offer is still valid, however.

EDIT #2: The free ornament offer is no longer available, however the free 50 custom photo cards is still valid.

Final Edit on 11/17: Please read the SeeHere Updates post that I just published.

As if the free 50 custom photo cards weren’t awesome enough (some people have even commented that they’ve already received their cards!), you can now get a free SeeHere custom Christmas ornament worth $12.99. Just like their previous offer, shipping is free, and the code you’ll need to use is mallornament. Make sure you select one of the two $12.99 ornaments, because those are the ones that work with this code.

Their site is slow as molasses since so many people are trying to get the freebie, but the code doesn’t expire until 3/31/2010, so you’ve got plenty of time. Hopefully the ornament arrives before Christmas, because who wants an ornament in February?

[via Money Saving Mom - thanks!]

This free energy conservation kit from the Tennessee Valley Authority is only available to parts of AL, GA, KY, MS, NC, TN, and VA. However, I’m posting it because it comes with two compact fluorescent light bulbs, outlet and light switch gaskets, filter whistle, two faucet aerators, hot water temperature gauge, home thermometer, and a “How to Save” brochure.

I have no idea what a faucet aerator or switch gasket is, but they sound cool. At the very least, I’m sure they could help me with my time machine. So far I’ve built the core unit and perfected making the “BZZZZZZZZZ … KERPHEW!” sound with my mouth. I just hope time travel actually sounds like that. Otherwise, I’m just some doofus making a weird noise in a large metal box!

[via Kelsea - thanks!]

EDIT: I’m gonna go on a limb and say this is no longer available.

These free Avery shipping labels are probably just that, shipping labels, instead of the more useful return address labels. Regardless, I signed up for them with my home address and will probably end up sending myself something in the mail. Oh, I know, I’ll send a time capsule!

What would future Goob most likely want? Probably the same things present Goob enjoys: Hello Kitty pajamas, Sponge Bob plush dolls, and a comfy Dora the Explorer blanket. Wait, did I just type what I was thinking in my head? Crap, I really wish my delete key wasn’t broken…

I know I’ve posted this free pet window decal before because it’s currently next to my front door, yet I can’t find the old post for the life of me. I’d make for a horrible detective. We probably only need one decal at any rate. The last thing I want is for firefighters to think I’ve got twenty dogs hiding in the house since I’ve got 10 decals plastered on the windows.

EDIT: Hopefully you signed up earlier, because all of the free calendars are gone now!

In order to get this free Eukanuba 2010 calendar, look at the right side of the page for an arrow pointing towards the dog with a pink force field floating around her. From the looks of it, the calendar has nine puppies on the cover, so be prepared for massive amounts of “awwwwwwwww” once it arrives in the mail.

I have no idea what Kraken Rum is, but I love old timey posters and alcohol, so I’m clearly in the free Kraken Rum poster target demographic. Too bad their store locator wasn’t working when I tried to use it this afternoon.

My mind was clearly elsewhere as I was signing up for this free 2010 Unity calendar. I put my street address in the address, city, AND zip code fields! I’m not sure why, but something tells me I won’t be getting this freebie.

Viva paper towels is giving away free recipe holders to the first 5,000 people to send a postcard or index card with their name, address, age and email (optional) to:

Food Network Magazine/VIVA Giveaway
P.O. Box 9221
Lyndhurst, NJ 07071

I haven’t seen this offer on many other freebie sites, so if you throw a card in the mail today, chances are you’ll get a freebie. In semi-related news, Coupons.com has a $0.40/2 Viva Towels Big Roll coupon available. In completely non-related news, I’m having trouble focusing today. There’s a new episode of Radio Lab sitting in iTunes and I’ve got a copy of Battlestar Galactica’s The Plan just waiting to be watched! Too bad I’m my own boss or I’d totally call in sick today.

EDIT: SmartSource also has the $0.40/2 Viva Towels Big Roll coupon available!

This free crock-pot recipe e-book has 33 total recipes in it and I couldn’t be happier. I just may live through the winter now! I don’t know who invented the crock-pot, but they deserve an award. It’s literally a magic pot – I throw in a bunch of raw ingredients in the morning and by dinner time, I have something edible and tasty. Why don’t we have more devices like this in our lives?

To get the recipe book, enter your e-mail address in the box that pops up on the first page and then select the option to skip straight to the recipe book. I didn’t print mine out since it’s 50 pages long, but I did print one or two recipes that I’ll try this week.

I’m not sure what the difference is between a normal calendar and this free 2010 wellness calendar, but I hope it has something to do with replacing the days of the week with vegetables. Hey look, it’s Carrotday.¹

Their website looks a little weird in Firefox, but the form went through just fine.

1. That was an atrocious joke and I apologize profusely. [↩]

Pocket Your Dollars put together a nice post of Office Max deals available this week, including a few items that you can get for free after MaxPerks Bonus Rewards. MaxPerks are Office Max’s version of a rewards program and are only available to businesses and schools, but they’re pretty lax on registration. For instance, I signed up for a business account for my home office, which pretty much anybody can claim to have.

These usually go pretty fast, so you might want to call ahead to make sure your local store has enough in stock.

Free After MaxPerks Bonus Rewards

Sharpie Black Pens 2-pack $1.99 (Limit 3)
Spend $1.99, earn $2 on your MaxPerks card
Final price: Free after MaxPerks Bonus Rewards

Manila Folders 100-count $6.99 (Limit 3)
Spend $6.99, earn $7 on your MaxPerks card
Final price: Free after MaxPerks Bonus Rewards

Bankers Boxes 10-pack $9.99 (Limit 3)
Spend $9.99, earn $10 on your MaxPerks card
Final price: Free after MaxPerks Bonus Rewards

5-Ream Case of Copy Paper (2,500 sheets) $16.99 (Limit 3)
Spend $16.99, earn $17 on your MaxPerks card
Final price: Free after MaxPerks Bonus Rewards

EDIT: Darn, this is no longer available.

Finally! Somebody has taken the lead and added six more months to the oncoming year. At least that’s what this free 18-month Danica Patrick calendar means to me. Just imagine how much more I’ll be able to not get accomplished with all that extra time to procrastinate!

There’s no space for your address, so I just put mine in the comment section. We’ll see if it ever comes, but it only took 10 second to sign up for, so no harm if it flakes out.

[via the forums]

The only bad things about meal idea books, like this free Nestle Carnation holiday recipe guide, is that you still have to cook the food in the end. Sure, a photo of what the casserole should look like, an ingredients list, and step-by-step instructions on how to make it might be enough for most people, but not me. Oh, don’t look at me that way, preheating an oven is far more complicated than it looks!

You can download the guide or opt to have it mailed to you.