Freebies and free stuff

EDIT: Aaaaaaand it’s dead.

Most of my friends are astronomically more creative than myself, so these free peacock feathers from East End Acres are for them. All you have to do is create an account, click “promo,” add the feathers to your cart then check out. Also, it shouldn’t ask for a credit card number since you’ll use the free promo cash they give all new members.

Now to figure out what to do with mine. Can I finger paint or draw stick figures on them? Because that’s pretty much all the artistic ability I posses. I don’t even know what noise peacocks make or else I’d stick them in my hair and pretend to be one, much to the annoyance of everyone within earshot!

Please don’t make me regret posting these. The only approved topics for the comments are how much you love HIF and how awesome Hiffers are. That’s it.

There’s a free 2012 President Obama reelection bumper sticker available while the GOP is offering a free #WeCantWait NObama sticker. Get one, get both, get neither, I really don’t care. Just don’t make me have to moderate the comments for the next few hours and I’ll be thrilled.

EDIT #3: (isn’t this fun…) The box has been removed and the sign up form is crashing. I’ll keep checking, but I think we Hiffed this.

EDIT #2: I found another link. Click on the yellow “Free Blade Offer” box in the lower left.

EDIT: Link has been fixed. That was weird.

Look, I know the holidays can make us all a little crazy. But please promise not to use this free Bosch oscillating blade to do anything stupid, okay?

I think the faux wood is what makes the card above fantastic.

Tiny Prints is giving away a free birthday greeting card today as long as you ship it to your house. If it’s sent anywhere else, you’ll have to pay $0.44 for postage. Use code FREEBD at checkout and you’ll be all set.

Edit: Hiffed

I think that if I had a pair of these free Revlon sunglasses from Sears Optical, I could pretend that my exercise bike in our living room is Cartman’s three-wheeler and I could tell the world to respect my authority…

As if it wasn’t enough that I dressed up as Matt Smith for Halloween–with a throw-back to Tennant’s Chucks–I now am glad that I found these free Norma Kamali 3D glasses to make my next year’s costume a little more like David Tennant.

Now, just to order that sonic screwdriver pen…

My wife swears that she can taste the difference between different types of water. So now, with two different water test kits, I might just have to try her. I can first try using this free Diamond Crystal salt water test kit to see if she can tell the difference between tap and filtered tap. Then afterwards, I think I’ll use this free Morton Salt water test kit to see if she can tell the difference between Aquafina and Dasani. I’m sure that they’ll probably read so close to the same on both kits that it won’t even be funny.

It won’t make a difference eitherway. After 4 different water taste tests, I’m sure that I’ll be sleeping on the couch with the fat cat for the rest of the week…

I used to be an amazingly avid reader. Not that I’m not anymore, but I don’t read nearly as much as I used to. With my hour commute everyday, I should do more, and I should definitely listen to more audiobooks.

But, with this free Water for Elephants audiobook, I might have to change my current streak. Sure, I needed to create an account and download their software, but that’s because I didn’t want to just air-stream it to my Kindle. I was feeling lazy, and not like reading. Sort of like an audiobook versus a book.

I’d get to listening to this one earlier, but after adoring the book when I read it a little over a year ago, well, I’m alright just bypassing it for a while…

At work they were surprised when I flat ironed my hair and came to work with an awesome comb-over/straight hair a la Matt Smith. Yup, the guy with the crazy curly afro was able to pull it off in an amazing Galifreyan way.

That makes me think that the next thing I need to do is grow a mustache, then register and participate in Movember so I can grab this free Movember promotional kit with its wristband, buttons, and posters.

Why not? I mean, I’ve already tried most hairstyles known to man-kind…

If you were to ask me what a Numismatist was about 15 minutes ago, I would have assumed it was something to do with someone’s nose. But now learning that its coin collecting, I can consider myself one of those and nose some nasal guy. I mean, you should see the jars of coins that I collect to use in claw machines.

Somehow, though I think this free 6 month ANA membership and magazine subscription is a little different than my obsession with winning that stuffed ninja turtle from the Fred Meijer by my house…