Freebies and free stuff

EDIT: Looks like we Hiffed it.

An organic energy drink, Viso, is giving away three free can caps while supplies last. Note that Viso cans look to be on the slender side, so they probably won’t fit on average soda cans but should fit on most energy drinks.

Speaking of energy drinks, I could go for one right now. It seems that I was born without the enzymes or proper cell count or whatever it is that allows most people to go “hey, you know what? It’s late and I’m tired, I think I should go to bed.” Even my dog is sitting here with a look on her face that can only be interpreted as “that bone you gave me earlier? It’s going in your jugular if you don’t turn that music off and let me get some sleep.”

With summer fast approaching (ABOUT TIME!), I should start blowing up all of my inflatable rafts and tubes. Of course, I guarantee some will have mysteriously gained a hole or tear while doing nothing more than sitting in my closet for the winter. Okay, that’s not true, as I’ve been known to ride them down stairs in the wee hours of the morning, but I’m sure that played no part in damaging them.

No worries though, as I found these free Tear-Aid patches today. Just make sure you don’t confuse them with eye patches. It’s one of the many dangers I face with my compulsive desire to be a pirate.

In stores until 3/14, you can get one free Hallmark card from the kids collection. Let’s just hope they’re not written by kids.

Actually, they could probably pen something better than me. All I’ve got so far is “Roses are red / Violets are …” Hmmm. Fluffy? This is tougher than I thought.

We all hear about Nielsen ratings when crappy TV shows get canceled, but it turns out that there’s a free Nielsen Home Scanner program that lets consumers track far more than just their TV habits. If accepted, they’ll send you a free scanner and you’ll then use it to scan the barcodes of your grocery purchases each week. For doing so, you’ll earn points which can be redeemed for prizes.

I’ll be honest here and say I’m quite new to this. I’m still waiting to see if I’m accepted or not, but I figured it’d be worth trying since I already buy groceries every week. It’s like how I approach Swagbucks – if I can get prizes for doing something I already do, then what’s stopping me?!

Does anybody have any experience with this? What’s it like?

I know this is another tobacco freebie, but free is free in my book. Marlboro is currently giving away your choice of a free canteen, playing cards, or hot sauce. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been outside long enough to need a canteen, so I went with the playing cards. I plan on scuffing them up so I can cheat in poker.

Wait, my friends read this site…

If you’ve ever signed up for any Marlboro freebies in the past, then all you have to do is login and click “promos & offers” and then “take a flavor break.” If for some reason the latter option isn’t available, type in code MAR9761 and it should appear.

Copenhagen is giving away free multi-tools, which is a fancy term for pocket knifes. If you signed up for the free camouflage hat they offered back in November, then your login info will work for this as well.

If you’re using Chrome, the first link won’t work, but I’ve got ya covered with a backup. I rather enjoyed the extra work in tracking down the second link, as it distracted me from staring at the clock and wishing it was time for Lost to come on.

Oh boy, now I’m thinking about it again…

EDIT: All good things must end…

Sam’s Club and Drumstick are offering free freezer bags and as usual, a Sam’s Club membership is not required. These bags look like an economical alternative to how I currently buy ice cream. You’d be surprised how many guys it takes to life an entire freezer case into my truck.

There are the usual large cities for the free screening on Hot Tub Time Machine next month, but they’re running this promotion in a ton of smaller cities (Norfolk, Fresno, Grand Rapids) that normally aren’t included.

No word yet if we’ll be allowed to take a spin in the hot tub if the movie stinks.

I must say vindication has never tasted so delicious. People always made fun of my desire to smell their tattoos, but this free Victoria’s Secret scented tattoo only proves there’s more people out there like me!

We’ll really be in business once flavored tattoos hit the market.

EDIT: I completely blanked and forgot to mention that this is an in-store freebie.

My dream of one day conquering a distant planet took a giant leap forward today when I discovered that anybody can stroll over to NASA and get a free space shuttle engine.

Can’t scrape together nearly $29 million, but still want a taste of outer space? You can now get an actual engine from the shuttle for free, as long as you cover the costs of moving and housing the eight-foot-diameter, four-ton behemoths. The AP reported on Saturday that NASA tried to sell them for $400,000 to $800,000 apiece in December 2008, but got no offers and is now literally giving them away.

Four tons is nothing. I’ve been eating Wheaties for a few weeks and recently stepped up my workout weights from two to five pounds. I’m more worried about my space suit. As of now, the only thing I have is an old rain jacket with two giant trash bags duct taped to the bottom.

[via Savvy Shopper]