I’ve never been a big fan of cigarettes, mainly because I enjoy being able to taste my food and having clothes that smelled fresh. Although when I get a little inebriated, for some reason I start to think it’s a brilliant idea to smoke a little. I also tend to believe that I’m an excellent singer, dancer, seducer, athlete, and just about any other activity you probably don’t want to engage in while drunk. But that’s another story in and of itself. My dad’s a heavy smoker but my mom isn’t, so I know all about how a lot of smokers are forced to partake in their smoking while being banished to the backyard deck. And if you’re anything like my dad, you could use this free pocket ashtray, because he was always having trouble finding an ashtray outside in the dark. It probably didn’t help matters when I’d accidentally break them and try to cover it up by hiding all the pieces. In fact, he still probably doesn’t even know how many of those things I smashed, so how about we let this be our little secret? Come on, I don’t want to have to bribe y’all!
[via the forums]