I go to school at UCF in Orlando, Florida. And there are a few simple rules about our campus. For most of y’all, these won’t make sense, but trust me, if you ever meet me down here, I’ll explain the list:
1) No matter what anyone calls that place in the union, it’ll never be Wack-a-Doos but always Locos.
2) To be in the Reflection Pond any day of the year other than Spirit Splash and not be caught and fined is a badge of honor.
3) They are not Nike and Hercules, they are AV and Phase II.
4) Whatever you do, do not feed the squirrels, they know where you live and will hunt you down and kill you, or at least steal all of your ramen and Easy Mac.
And its with that 4th rule that I have to post my latest solution to making sure the little buggers don’t get all of my cheap starchy goodness of doom–this.
Yes, my freebee loving friends, when this little package comes, I’ll be holding onto it like a 5’2″ skinny blonde tri-Delt holds onto her mace while walking through a parking garage at 10pm on a Thursday night. Possibly tighter, though. Our squirrels are vicious.
Authors note: This ws not meant to insult or harm anyone in any Greek organization or any North American Grey Squirrel. If you find said humor offensive, don’t worry, I didn’t think it was very funny either.
[via the forums]