Free Einstein Bros Bagel

Free Einstein Bros Bagel

Is it safe to assume if I get a free Einstein Bros bagel and shmear with any purchase, I'll become as smart as the titular reference? I could use the extra brainpower to figure out how in the world to fix my dishwasher. I first noticed a problem when I couldn't locate my refrigerator through the sea of bubbles.

If not, I'll settle for his crazy awesome hair.

This freebie is available Wednesday, August 15 only and should be redeemable via your phone. I'd personally download their free mobile app ahead of time since the press release says you have to “show a restaurant app” on your phone.

Don't forget you can also sign up for the Einstein Bros birthday freebie and get some free food every year!

Free Arby's Fries & Drink

Free Arby’s Fries and Drink

Calling all Arby's fans!


Hey, where'd everyone go?

It's not the most fantastic of deals, but if you're in the market for a cheap lunch, then why not get a free small fries and drink with the purchase of an Arby's Loaded Italian sandwich? This freebie is valid through 3/28/18.

Free Auntie Anne's Pretzel

Free Auntie Anne’s Pretzel on March 3

Free Pretzel Day Monday, April 26, 2021 which means you can get a free Auntie Anne's original or cinnamon sugar pretzel. However, this year we only get freebies if one million people RSVP ahead of time. So far, they're a sliver over 200k, so we've got a ways to go.

Assuming we hit our milestone, head to your local spot from 10am to 2pm and pick up your free Auntie Anne's pretzel.

The only downside is you have to leave your house in order to get the freebie and that means you have to put on pants. And who willingly wears pants during the weekend?

🎂 Birthday Freebie Reminder 🚨

Don't forget to sign up for Auntie Anne's birthday freebie and get a free pretzel every year! 🥨

[thanks to everyone who sent this in!]

Free Chipotle Guacamole Chips

Free Chipotle Guacamole & Chips

If the possibilities of E. coli, norovirus, salmonella, Campylobacter, or hepatitis doesn't scare you, then make sure to snag a free order of Chipotle guacamole & chips with the purchase of an entree. Mmmmm, salmonella and guac, just like mom used to make!

I kid, I kid. I will 100% redeem this freebie and enjoy every last bite of it.

In order to get your free coupon, simply their app for iOs or Android and place your first order through the app before 12/21/17. This freebie is only for new users of the app.

[thanks to all the Hiffers who sent this in!]

Free Panda Express Entree

Free Panda Express Entree with Any Purchase

Now through the end of the year (well, almost, 12/30/17), you can get a free Panda Express small entree dish with any online purchase. This means you can order a cheap small drink, side, or appetizer and you get the entree for free, making this a super cheap meal.

You'll need to use promo COMFORT during checkout.

Free Carnation Breakfast Essentials

Free Carnation Breakfast Essentials

I used to drink free Carnation Breakfast Essentials in high school, but then forgot all about them until I went through chemo a few years back. You could say I've since completely lost my appetite for them. 😀 Though the negative association with certain foods because of chemo sometimes works in my favor. Now instead of explaining why quiche is the nastiest “food” ever invented (it's been scientifically proven by Dr. Goob) or how green beans are Nature's preferred method of torture, I can simply say “uh…cancer?” and get out of eating them! Makes those few months of feeling like death totally worth it.

[thanks to Hiffer Kim for sending this in!]

Kids Eat Free at IHOP

Kids Eat Free at IHOP

Now through September 25, 2016, kids eat free at IHOP with the purchase of each adult entree from 4-10pm at participating locations. However the geniuses behind what I have to assume is at least a million dollar campaign forgot one key detail during all their meetings. I couldn't find a list of participating locations on their site.

That being said, you'll probably want to call your nearest IHOP before heading off with the little ones in toe.

Free Kit Kat & Sierra Mist

Man oh man, am I sad today. Talk about an end of an era. I first discovered both The Daily Show and Stephen Colbert while channel surfing on September 12, 2002. To say I was hooked from the start would be an understatement. You don't just happen to randomly remember what you watched on TV 12 years ago.

For me and millions of others, The Colbert Report wasn’t just a goofy comedy show, it was “must see TV” for the twenty-first century. I’d be flabbergasted if I missed more than 3 of the 1440+ episodes. I can’t think of a single show that flopped either. Sure, there were segments here or there that missed the mark, but overall Colbert was in my life and making me laugh more than any other stranger over the past decade. And all while in character! I can't imagine what that must be like 🙂

I shouldn't be tearing up all day like I have been. The man's not dead! He'll be back on TV before the end of next summer! I'm clearly biased, but there's no doubt in my mind he'll be amazing filling Letterman's shoes. But for the next nine months, my evenings will be a tad dimmer. September is an eternity away right now.

To Stephen and everybody who ever put an hour of work into that show, I cannot thank you enough. Colbert is my comedy idol and if I ever have an ounce of his talent or charisma, I'll die a happy man.

I think the only thing that could cheer me up would be a little comfort food like a free Kit Kat candy bar or a free Sierra Mist 2 liter.

Well hey, look at that!

Free Splenda Sweetener

It's been a few years since a free Splenda sweetener sugar offer was around. They gave away free Splenda Naturals stevia samples deep into 2018, but even that appears to have stopped.

As we wait for the sweet freebies to return, here are some high value Splenda coupons along with a few classic HIF jokes from the archives!

Old HIF Splenda Jokes

There's a free Splenda Essentials sugar offer on their Facebook page. You'll also be entered into a contest where a $1000 Visa giftcard will be given away for every 10,000 samples they send out. In other words, tell your friends to get the freebie but stipulate you have dibs if they win the gift card. If they actually go for that, please let me hang out with them.

Today's “always mysteriously available” offer is free Splenda Essentials “sugar”. You get to pick between one with Antioxidants or B vitamins, so study up. I just spend 5 hours on WebMD trying to find out which was more important, but the only thing I learned was that I probably have lupus.

I'm not much of a Splenda fan though. I don't even like the sugar that you can buy in the store. Nope, I go straight for sugar the way Mother Nature intended it to be – in cane form! Sure, some people stare when they see what looks like bamboo sticking out of my coffee mug, but they don't know what they're missing.