Free Biofreeze Pain Relief Gel

Free Biofreeze Pain Relief Gel

This free Biofreeze pain relief gel works wonders for whenever you're in pain, but can't find a walk-in freezer to sooth your aching muscles. I've actually used this stuff for years and it's way better than Icy Hot.

I signed up for this three times to test it out. My VA address was rejected, but NY and SC were good to go, so YMMV.

Thanks to my aforementioned migraines, I happened to discover Biofreeze when I started HIF and instantly fell in love. Imagine Icy Hot on steroids. I put so much on my shoulders that I swore it was going to fry the skin off and while I know that doesn't sound too appealing, anybody with muscle or back pain knows how much of a “good hurt” that burning sensation can be. And that's coming from a guy who cries whenever he gets a hangnail!


Free Arm & Hammer Toothpaste


2019 Update: Over the years, Arm & Hammer used almost a dozen different websites to give away this freebies. It felt like whack-a-mole chasing them down. They were also one of the only freebies where you had to copy and paste the URL in order for it to work. You couldn't click a link! And the bugs! Oh man, the freebies were always around, but the sites were bugged out at least 40% of the time.

Sadly, I'd trade what we have now for all those bugs. Why? Because Arm & Hammer no longer offers this freebie. 😭 After over a decade, it is no more!

I'm not joking when I say this was a huge, perpetual freebie. I must have mentioned it on two dozen interviews and news articles alone. It's sad to see it finally expire, but it makes me smile thinking how many hundreds of thousands of Hiffers had clean teeth thanks to this freebie!

I mad so many jokes about this sample over the years, that some of them were actually good! I decided to compile my favorite ones below. Just because this freebie died doesn't mean our sense of humor has to as well!

Don't worry either! If this freebie comes back, I'll be the first to know 🙂

I never really understood the name of this brand. Arm & Hammer? What does a hammer have to do with getting rid of odors or cleaning your teeth? And then look at the arm a little closer. It's a left shoulder, but a right hand. Who has an arm like that?! Have you ever actually seen an arm like that? And if so, was it holding a hammer? See, these are the things I spend my time thinking about while other people just see a link to some free Arm & Hammer toothpaste, sign up for the stuff, and then go about their day.

Every time I stumble across some free Arm & Hammer toothpaste I can't help but wonder if they couldn't have picked a better logo. I understand how the A&H logo is widely known and recognized, but still, neither an arm nor a hammer are objects that I want near my teeth.

This free Arm & Hammer toothpaste campaign has been running for over a year, which means we should all have brilliant teeth by now. Is dentistry even an employable field anymore? I almost feel bad for putting them out of work, but then again, they seemed to enjoy drilling my teeth a little too much.

This stuff always reminds me of my dad. When I was a kid, he used nothing but Arm & Hammer toothpaste and I would always sneak into the bathroom to use it since my bathroom was always stocked with pink bubble-gum or all-natural toothpaste. So as I was signing up for my free Arm & Hammer toothpaste, I couldn't help but think of my dad and swiping his toothpaste.

Here's another oldie but goodie sample, though for some reason this free Arm & Hammer sensitive toothpaste link demands we copy & paste it instead of clicking it. They sure nailed the sensitive aspect down.

You may have to copy and paste the link for free Arm & Hammer truly radiant toothpaste. Because nothing quite radiates after I take a hammer to it? I like how it says we'll never go back either. Like somebody took a hammer to the door we just walked through.

Free Cal-EZ Calcium Supplement

Free Supplements

Free Cal-EZ Calcium Supplement

Free supplements pop up from time to time. Below are a list of past free supplement and vitamins that we've found, stretched back about a decade. I've also included a few of the random jokes we made along the way! 🙂

There's a small “free samples” button in the lower right that allows you to request free Nordic Naturals supplements. You get to choose between a Wellness, Pet Essential, and a Child Pack. Now we get to wait 6 to 8 weeks then have our kids down some mystery pills sent in the mail by strangers!

According to a panel of experts consisting of me, the slogan for free Beast nutrition supplement is “AHHHHHH, A BEAST, RUUUUUUN!”

With this free Everlast supplement, you get to choose from Energy or Recovery. I went with recovery, because I'm hoping that if I use it despite not exercising, maybe I can trick my body into thinking I exercised. It's part of my long-term goal to get in shape without ever working out.

I'd be happy to share my results so far, but that will have to wait for later as I'm getting winded typing this post.

Today's free Basic Greens sample is a nutritional supplement that claims to have 15 servings of vegetables and fruit in every glass. Clearly they've industrialized the Honey, I Shrunk The Kids shrink ray. At least that's the only explanation I've got as to how they cram over two dozen servings of greens into a 9 gram bag.

If this free Rage supplement isn't a supplement, that means we're getting free rage. I don't want to speak for everyone, but I'm happy with my current low levels of burning anger.

Costco is offering a free Align Probiotic supplement, which is … I have no idea. And that's after spending 10 minutes Googling “probiotic.” No matter what link I clicked, I kept ending up at its Wikipedia page for a few minutes before realizing my eyes had glazed over. I'm not even paying attention right now. Am I still typing? I should probably hit the Publish button.

If you woke up this morning feeling a bit light on calcium and you haven't fully committed to going green by replacing your lawnmower with a cow, then sign up for some free Cal-EZ calcium supplements.

Ohhhh, this free Align Probiotic supplement contains B. infantis 35624 instead of last year's B. infantis 35623? That's the newest software update! I think it added wifi capabilities.

These free Nature's Bounty adult gummies reminded me of my youthful supplement: Flintstones vitamins. Those suckers were amazing and frankly I didn't believe they were healthy since they tasted like candy. In fact, I blame them for my current addiction to M&Ms.

To add insult to injury, they didn't even come through on their promise. I thought if I ate enough, I could power my first car like Fred did in the cartoon. Imagine my shock when I learned I couldn't run fast enough after I'd cut the bottom out of my car.

This free Curamin dietary supplement has both curcuminoids and Boswellia, so you know it's gonna be good!

I actually read that last ingredient as “boll weevils” and thought to myself, “well, that's one way to lose some weight.” I know, it's shocking that I'm not a licensed doctor.

Very few freebie forms contain a salutations field, but this free Nature's Bounty fish oil is one of the exceptions. I enjoy it because it's the only time I get to go by Dr. Goob.

It'll take 4-6 weeks for our free Theanine Serene supplements to arrive, so that'll give me plenty of time to Google “what is theanine” and “do I need theanine?” and “can theanine give me super powers?” You know, all the important questions.

This free Natrol Welcome Pack comes with free samples of their supplements or medicine or vitamins or whatever it is they sell. I don't get how companies can give away free meds like this. It's obviously not prescription strength (right?!), but still, it baffles my poor little mind. Then again, so does El Nino and mirrors, so what do I know? Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go try and kill my evil twin who always taunts me in the bathroom.

Previous Samples

These are the types of supplements you can expect as freebies.

  • Airborne
  • Align Priobotic
  • Avoca
  • Basic Greens
  • Beast Nutrition
  • Cal ez Calcium
  • Curamin
  • Drinkables Liquid
  • Everlast
  • Firstshake
  • Lactaid
  • Mid Night Sleep
  • Musclegel
  • Nature's Bounty
  • Nordic Naturals
  • Theanine
  • Voots

Two Free Pedometers

Two Free Pedometers

There have been a ton of free pedometers given away over the years. They were a staple among the freebie world when I started HIF in the mid-aughts. Below are some of the random jokes we made.

As always, this page will update just as soon as the next company decides to give away some free pedometer swag!

Want to find out how many miles you walk in a day? Then get your very own free pedometer.

Does anyone else ever get a free pedometer and then vigorously shake it for a few minutes to make it look like they've been more active than they have? No, just me? Okay, carry on.

Golf Digest and Humana are teaming together to offer us a free pedometer. I hope they don't expect me to actually walk when I play golf. Driving around in the carts is half most all the fun.

On second thought, I hope they don't actually expect me to play golf.

If you take a short survey, you'll get a free pedometer in the mail from this company. I already got my free pedometer from a different offer months ago, but maybe I'll get two and attach one to each of my legs to see which foot takes more steps.

I hope everyone had a great Christmas last week, because I certainly did. I had a house full of friends and family, so I did the unthinkable and closed my laptop for a few days. My hands literally tried to resist as I ordered them to perform the task, but they finally relented when I promised to soon fill them with freshly baked cookies. It was a risky plan, especially since I ended up eating about 9 million cookies, but I think it was totally worth it. Plus there's a free pedometer offer out there that I can put to good use burning off the recently added pounds! Oh, who am I kidding, I'll probably only wear it as I walk back and forth from the kitchen getting more leftover goodies.

Wow, I haven't seen a free pedometer offer in years, let alone two free pedometers from Cigna HealthSpring. These used to be all the rage in the freebie world from '06-08, but I guess Americans stopped trying to be healthy when the economy tanked. Sounds about right.

Why two freebies instead of one? Well duh, it's blatantly obviously. They want us to strap one to each hip and finally confirm once and for all that neither leg takes an extra step when we're not looking.

The free Nature's Bounty pedometer offer is back. Since receiving mine in mid-June, I've taken a grand total of 48 steps. Wait, that sounds way too high.

Three Free Hydroxycut Samples

Three Free Hydroxycut Samples

Hydroxycut has moved their freebie system over to an internal VIP club. All you have to do is make a free account and you'll be the first to hear about samples, coupons, and other freebies.

We used to be able to select up to three free Hydroxycut samples on their Facebook page, ranging from gummies to sprinkles. Sprinkles?! Heck yeah! I guess that means I can lose weight while eating tons of ice cream.

Free Airborne Sample

Free Airborne Samples

I like how the mascot for these four free Airborne samples is called “Airborne Guy.” I wonder how much money the marketing team earned for that coup.

As of 2021, the only way to get any Airborne Supplement freebies is to join the free Schiff Rewards program. This is run by Airborne's parent company and they sent out unique coupons to members.

You can get four free Airborne samples. I don't have 6 to 8 weeks to wait on my samples to arrive as I'm about to take an 8 hour flight. I'm banking on this stuff working immediately through some sort of magic or dark science.

Walmart is also giving away four free Airborne samples. Coupled with the four previous freebies coming our way, that makes … *squints eyes, pulls out calculator and protractor, and rummages around for graphing paper* … let's see. Ummmm *loads Google, somehow ends up on YouTube, finds cat videos*

Free Crohn’s Cookbook

I used to like watching House. There was something cool about all of the medical diagnosis that they'd have and how if you tweaked one thing or another, it was something completely different. It was like watching a mad scientist at play.

So add that mad science to the kitchen and I guess that's where this free Crohn's disease cookbook comes in handy. Sure, it might be for those who have Crohn's, but I'm sure those without might enjoy the tweaks in their own recipes.

Or just to laugh evilly over a pot of alphabet soup…

Free Sharps Needle Container

Looks like I'm gonna have to contract diabetes so that I can take full advantage of my free Sharps needle container. At this rate, freebies truly are going to be the end of me.

Free BeingGirl Sample Kit

It's been seven months since we last posted the free BeingGirl sample kit, but lo and behold this freebie is still kicking. Not literally, which is good because I have weak shins.

The kit includes:

  • 2 Tampax Pearl Tampons
  • 1 Compak Pearl Tampon
  • 1 Always Infinity Maxi-Pad
  • 2 Always Pantiliners
  • 14 FIM-92 Stinger surface-to-air missile launchers
  • 1 Always Feminine Wipe
  • Some coupons

Okay, I made one of those up.

Free Zyrtec Sample & Coupons

Walmart is giving away some free Zyrtec samples and coupons, which is just in time for spring blossom! … Wait, isn't this a few month's too late? Do people get bad allergies during the fall and winter? I rarely leave my protective apartment cocoon, so I don't know much about the outside realm.

The “Get Special Savings” button will take you to a page where you can print $2 and $4 coupon. To get the sample, click on “Zyrtex 10mg Tablets.” There are quite a few states that don't love their residents and want them to suffer from allergies year round, however. They include: Arizona, Connecticut, District of Columbia, Iowa, Kansas, Massachusetts, Minnesota, New York, North Dakota, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, and Vermont.

Free Menopause Survival Kit

We posted this free Menopause Survival Kit back in December, but I'm not sure if it came or not for those who signed up. Suffice to say, this was one of those freebies where I signed up a friend or relative instead of myself. Something tells me I'm not going to be going through Menopause anytime soon.