EDIT: Unfortunately their supplies have been exhausted.
Folks, somebody broke into my house and ate all of the Halloween candy I'm supposed to give out tomorrow. And, uh, they … okay, I confess, it was me, but it wasn't my fault! Okay, maybe it was my fault, but there was a good reason! Fine, you got me, there wasn't a good reason, but I was hungry and there was nothing else to eat! Oh stop looking at me that way, I admit it, I wasn't even hungry and my pantry is stocked. Dang, you're good at this – are you sure you're not a cop?
As soon as thisarrives, I'll use it to wash the shame off.