There was a Marble Slab freebie on Monday, so I figured I'd post the Marble Slab Creamery birthday freebie today. It's that kind of symmetry that I'm not known whatsoever for.

Hey, this Marie Callender's birthday freebie has been updated. And while I'd normally complain over losing free pie, one of the few things I'll accept as an equal replacement is a free breakfast meal! If you ever have to tell me bad news, hand me a giant cup of hot coffee and a plate of bacon first and I promise things will go smoothly.

Don't be alarmed by the title of the free birthday breakfast offer. A Magnificent Six is one number off a Western shootout. You'll get to finish your meal at any pace you want without worrying about Wyatt Earp giving you any side eye.

I have no idea what a spumoni sundae is, but how awful could a sundae be? As long as it has zero vegetables in it, I'm down to eat my Spaghetti Warehouse birthday freebie.

I swear I'm almost ready to launch the new birthday page. I've been reaching out to a final few companies on Twitter in an effort to confirm their birthday freebie. If anybody wants to help me hound a few companies that are avoiding me (Applebee's and Chipotle, just to name a few), I'm sure that could be arranged!

The Sticky Fingers birthday freebie brought me back to my college days. I used to eat there religiously. Literally. I found the best ribs were had Sunday morning while the rest of town was in church. Who says you don't learn life lessons in college anymore?

Holy moly, it's the return the Friendly's birthday freebie offer. If you're anything like me, you can't take your eyes off that pile of diabetes.

I mean deliciousness.

Hey, here's a national treasure of an offer! The Ruby Tuesday birthday freebie is a pretty sweet deal. Well, not literally. Unless you put cookies or ice cream on your burgers, but … then … wait a minute …

*rushes off to the kitchen*

You know about the full list of free birthday food and other cool offers for your special day, right?

I'm looking over the list of restaurants I still have to post for this series and I think I'm about to down to regional ones. That can be both good and bad. On the negative side they're only available to certain people. But as the Acapulco birthday freebie shows, their freebies tend to be pretty good.

And again, for the record, you're not supposed to print the image above. That's merely there to show that this freebie is legit and help you know what to look for in your email.

I'm wary of any place whose name is associated with death. Sure, a Smokey Bones birthday freebie might be nice, but do you know how many people want me dead? Well, none that I know of, but I once stole Timmy Johnson's cupcake in the 3rd grade. I'm sure he's still plotting his revenge.

Looks like the Genghis Grill birthday freebie has changed! Now your free birthday offer is based on how many visits to Genghis Grill you made over the previous year. 0-3 visits gets you a free appetizer or dessert while 4+ visits gets you a free regular bowl.

I interpret that as a bowl of food. Could be rice, could be cereal!