Hey, It’s Free!

EDIT2: Call the mortician!

EDIT: Apparently this is a contest and they’re only giving away 300 of these. My bad, folks. Apparently I can’t read today.

According to Johnson’s free Melt Away Stress lotion, the solution for too much stress is getting so hot it melts away. No wonder people on tropical islands are always so laid back and relaxed.

I’m not sure how many of you out there need a free Craftsman Tools hat, but here you go regardless! I have quite the weird relationship with hats. Growing up, I never went anywhere without one, but then my head decided to rebel against being constantly covered. I now have a lumpy head that rejects just about any hat I try and put on it.

Oh yeah, you’ll need a code to get there, which is COOLTOOLS

[via Swamprat]

Well folks, for me, I won’t be around for a while for my little freebee interjections, meaning you’ll be getting all Goob, all the time for the next 20ish days on the front page. Just like the old days before he got me and the other additional writers.

Needless to say, sadly, its not going to be for vacation, like these wonderful free Perillo Tours DVDs show. No sirree, I won’t be lounging on a beach anywhere. I’ll be graduating, then driving a 26′ moving truck across the American Heartlands for about 1,000 miles to start a new phase of my own life.

But man, with the scenes from those DVDs that I’ve seen on their commercials? I might have to order these as soon as I move into my new place, because lord knows I’ll need a vacation then…

[via the forums]

Man, this free Hannah Montana wake up call is a rip off. It’s just some pre-recorded baloney! Call me crazy, but I think Miley Cyrus should be forced to get up super early and physically make all these calls herself. In fact, to prove that I’m way cooler and more awesome than some annoying teenager, I’ll do just that. Contact me with your free Grandcentral number, a date, and a time and you just might be getting a free Goob wake up call

Maybe this coupon for some Downy Total Care laundry detergent will last longer than straight up freebies that Wal Mart usually offers. Of course, since I just jinxed it, that probably won’t happen. Regardless, you have to be happy with a detergent that takes total care of your clothes though. I once bought some half care detergent and my clothes were looking pretty pathetic afterwords.

Almost as pathetic as that joke I just made!

Do you have the upcoming start of school date circled a million times on your calendar? Have the kids informed you they’re bored for the millionth time this month yet? Then get them this free GeoTrax DVD and enjoy 30 minutes of peace.

I haven’t the slightest idea what this cartoon is about, though. What do I look like, somebody who watches Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends on Cartoon Network all day long? On second thought, don’t answer that. What I DO know, however, is that I hope this isn’t something that my little brother will get hooked on. Then he’ll beg me nonstop for more videos and I’ll have to buy them, thus making me loose money on this little deal. So here’s to hoping this is a highly mediocre and forgettable DVD!

I don’t like posting downloads often because, well, who really wants to download a freebee, you know? There’s something about opening up your mail box and finding something sitting in it which is a lot more alluring and awesome.

But, when I saw the free audiobook for “The World is Flat” by Thomas Friedman, I had to jump on this one. I read the book about a year or so back and by far, it was one of the more interesting ones that crossed my path. Maybe not what you’d want to read everyday, but it tracks globalization and our changing economy very nicely. Its a nice little primer about how our world is slowly changing.

Oh, and by the way… When you get the e-mail from them about the download, if you don’t want to wait to get the e-mails about the other parts to download? Just change out the number “1″ in file name online for the other numbers, and you can download all of the parts tonight… Be sure to hurry, though… This freebee is only good till August 4th!

[via the forums]

I miss being a kid. Sippy cups were awesome. Sadly, I don’t have any more now, but…

Now, I can go get this free sippy cup from Juicy Juice, and you know what will be the first thing that goes in it? Budweiser. While its still all American.

This sippy cup had better get here fast before the InBev deal goes through…

[via the forums]

I won’t lie that I’m biased with this upcoming election, but I’ve sworn that I’ll leave that off of the front page here.

So, in the spirit of being unbiased, I realized that just sharing this free Obama button from MoveOn.org, would be partisan of me. To express the HIF bipartisan spirit, if you actually go to McCainStore.com, you can send a SASE to them and they’ll mail you a free McCain bumper sticker.

Wow, this reaching across the party lines thing isn’t that hard to do at all now…

[via the forums and the Google]

This economy sucks, srsly. And if you needed to know otherwise, well, look at it this way: in the 1930’s, if you had $.60 in your bank account, you’d have enough money to eat for at least a day and probably buy a newspaper. Now? You can buy a stamp and maybe a pack of gum. Try living for a day off of stamp glue and gum alone.

Enter HippoPost.com. Instead of buying that stamp and the pack of gum, you can now log in online and daily send out up to 2 free postcards! So, if you’re away on vacation and have your digital camera, laptop, and free wi-fi at your hotel? Forget spending a buck on the postcards, just take a family picture, add on some “Wish you were here” sentiments, and upload and send away.

Sure, they put some advertisements on the postcard, but they print it and pay for the postage and everything! And with the way costs are rising, well, that $1.50 could soon buy you two stamps and a candy bar.

[via the forums]

I’m not much of a cook, but I try my hardest. And by “try my hardest” I mean “take food and then drench it in seasonings.” I don’t even care if this free McCormick steak seasoning isn’t any good. By the time I’m through cooking with it, there will be so many other seasonings mixed in that your taste buds will probably implode after only two bites.

I’m still finding trash in my yard from the 4th of July weekend. I’m not joking. I’m not sure if you can have too much of a good time, but I’m seriously thinking about it now! I’m fairly confident that I’ll still be picking up garbage by the time these free Glad Force Flex trash bags arrive, so at least I’ll have somewhere to put it all.

Friend of the site Alissa of Free Samples Direct is giving away $25 to whoever sends the most traffic her way over the next week. Now, I doubt HIF will win, but if we do I’ll turn around and give it away to one of my lucky readers.**

No, the reason I like FSD is because it’s actually a darn good freebie site. There’s only six other freebie sites I read on a daily basis and it’s at the top of my list. Most people mention that they like how I keep all of those spammy fake “freebies” off of HIF - well, FSD is no different. In fact, she’s so good at finding legit freebies, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve found a freebie on her site before I’ve been able to post it on HIF

So check out Free Samples Direct!

** Here’s the deal. Leave a comment on this post telling me what you like best about HIF or what I could do to make it better and if I win the prize, I’ll pick a random commenter and forward the money to them!

Yesterday morning, my wife and I went to Panera before she had an eye appointment. And just after one small hazelnut coffee from them, I felt like I could run faster than a speeding bullet and stop train cars.

So I wonder how I’d feel after drinking all of this free Cuisinart coffee sample? I guess my caffeine tolerance is going down again seeing I’m not drinking three energy drinks a day…

EDIT: Looks like this one is dead now folks…

[via the forums]

Ever go to a concert and have your head splitting from all of the loud music? Oh boy oh boy have I ever. From the KISS/Aerosmith show I saw in West Palm, to Brand New jumping up and down on a small Orlando stage when noone knew who they were, to watching Small Town Sleeper after I opened for them at a small coffee house, I learned a heck of a neat little trick: pop in a pair of ear plugs. They’ll dampen the sound enough at any live show you go to, and you’ll still be able to hear the music just fine. And when you’re done? You’ll be hearing just fine and not damaging your ears at all.

That’s what makes this free Aearo ear plug sample so great: you don’t need to use it just to muffle out annoying siblings!

[via the forums]