Freebies and free stuff

Here’s the thing. You can either sign up for a free Triple Action Purex detergent sample now or wait “a few weeks” to get free Purex UltraPacks detergent. I feel like one of those kids in the famous delayed gratification study. I’m staring at the signup form, trying to figure out why I suddenly have the urge to complete it. I don’t even want to do laundry, I just want the freebie!

Ah, screw it, I’m signing up now. Ohhhh yeah, that’s the stuff.

There’s a stupid auto-play video, so make sure your speakers aren’t jacked up.

Sam’s Club is offer free ProForce Cleaner yet again. Membership is required, so either pull out your card or make up a 9-digit number. You know the drill by now. In order to reach the signup form, click the glowing white dot near the handle of the cleaner. It’s a scavenger hunt and freebie rolled into one!

Once again, Target has a few samples for us. Yup, head over to their page for some free Dove Nourishing Oil and Woolite Detergent. So I guess I can treat my hair while I do my laundry. It’d be like slumber party! All I’d need would be Dirty Dancing and a bottle of chardonnay!

Are you kidding me? Another limited freebie to the first 100,000 people?! This time it’s a free Scoth-Brite Greener clean scrub on Facebook and … oh boy. I got nothing. Screw Flanders, screw Flanders, screw Flanders.

Actually, what’s going on in that image? Is that a coffee ring being cleaned up? Who sets their coffee next to 30 rolls of paper towels? That has “Accident Waiting to Happen” written all over it.

EDIT: This is dead barely two hours after I posted it. That’s about par for the course lately.

Sam’s Club is offering free Pro-Force cleaning samples and … I don’t care. The past few days have been a mishmash of screw ups, breaking things, losing crazy important things, bad news, and overall craptitude. I’m out of here to go buy some wine.

Roll over either bottle and click the “get a sample” button. You’ll need a 9-digit Sam’s Club membership ID number and, as usual, any random numbers will work.

EDIT: Wow. That died fast.

You can get up to five free Seventh Generation dish soap samples on Facebook – one for you and four for your friends. It’d be nice if Seventh Generation would just send all five samples to you. No, not so you could keep them all, but so you could have your friends come over to pick them up in person. I’d get them in the door, show them the freebie, and then say they’d only get it if they first cleaned my dishes.

EDIT: And they’re out of freebies now.

When I first saw this free Crypton Home Travel Bag and samples offer, I thought I should call Clark Kent up and warn him…

Anyone have his number?

Here is yet another free $35 P&G coupon booklet filed with cleaning supply coupons. According to my records, this is the nine hundredth time this has been offered. Then again, my records aren’t that accurate. Just ask the IRS agent who has audited me the past six years running. Shout out to Agent Ramirez!

This free Shout color catcher looks like a new form. Plus it accepted my info without saying I’d already requested a sample, so that’s good enough for me to publish this. I have a pretty low bar when it comes to quality control. I’m the Creed Bratton of freebies.

Question: How will we know if we’ve received our free invisible glass wipes?

I’m sorry. Trust me, I’m ashamed of myself over how corny that was. They can’t all be gold.

I believe they only have 1,000 or so freebies a day. If you miss out, try again later.

[thanks Toni!]