For years while growing up, I always thought this free Gold Bond powder had something to do with James Bond. As in it was a product that had been made up for a Bond movie and then created into an actual product for people to buy. Yeah, I know, I was a gullible kid. But then I never understood why the commercials had old people on them. James Bond wasn’t old. And then I decided to actually listen to the commercial and I saw that it was for rashes. James Bond didn’t get rashes. He beat the bad guy, got the girl, and enjoyed a tasty beverage all in the span of 12 minutes. Guys who can do that don’t get rashes! And it was then that I realized my childhood had been built on false dreams. Well, not “childhood” so much as “knowledge of commercial goods.” And to a 9 year old, that’s not really a big deal whatsoever.

[via Kristofer and the forums]