Food Freebies

Free Hardee’s Soda


Don’t be fooled by the machine pictured on this free Hardee’s soda coupon. It promises your choice of over 127 different drinks, but your actual beverage will more closely resemble the following:

  • 20% Coke as you begin filling up.
  • Maybe 20% Cherry Coke instead?
  • Is that 10% Vanilla Coke? I haven’t had that in ages!
  • Hold on, I didn’t really look at the first list of drinks. What’s 10% Barq’s again?
  • Oh yeah, that’s horrible. Look, 10% Fanta! I used to hate their commercials.
  • What in the heck is 10% Strawberry Fanta? I didn’t know that was even a thing.
  • What other weird combos do they have? 10% Peach Sprite?!
  • Now to top this bad boy off with *closes eyes and randomly selects* 10% Grape Mellow Yellow. Perfect.
  • takes sip of drink
  • immediately regrets every life decision that lead to this
  • empties drink
  • 100% water it is.

Free Taco Seasoning & Triscuit Crackers


Today’s Freebie Friday is brought to you by the letter H. It’s the first letter in Hangover. It can also be used to start the sentences How about we never drink again? or Huuuuuuuuuush I’ve got a hangover.

For those without elephants parading through their head, venture to SavingStar for some free Ortega taco seasoning or Kroger for some tasty free Triscuit Thin Crisps.

Free Candy Bar & Cat Treats


I can distinctly remember this old ad campaign for today’s free Mounds or Almond Joy and thinking “what kind of people are eating nuts and coconut in their candy?” It was my first encounter with true evil.

Meanwhile Kroger is using this week to keep our furry friends happy by giving away a free bag of Temptations cat treats. I was about to say don’t be tempted to eat these yourself, but if the alternative is a freaking Almond Joy or Mounds, then by all means go to town on these.

Free Nesquik Chocolate Milk

EDIT: Annnnnd it’s dead again.

According to my sources, there are 300,000 available samples of free Nesquik chocolate milk. That’s enough milk to fill … well I’ve got no idea how many Olympic swimming pools it’d fill, but I have to know now.

*updates Bucket List*

Free Hunt’s Sauce & Idahoan Casseroles


A small part of me wakes up every Friday wondering if that will be the day these Friday Freebies cease to exist. They came out of nowhere and, like any great Mariners fan, I expect the shoe to drop at any minute. Yet we have SavingStar offering free Hunt’s tomato sauce while Kroger is doling out free Idahoan Steakhouse Casseroles.

Sweet, another week in the bag. I guess next week will be the bad one.

Free Quest Protein Bar

Free Quest Protein Bar

EDIT: This freebie was originally posted on Feb. 23, 2014 but is available again!

Too bad I need my free Quest protein bar today as opposed to eight weeks from now. The quest of “walking to the grocery store amidst sheets of snow and ice” looms before me and frankly I don’t think I can conquer it.

*goes into kitchen to make lunch, but can only find vegetables*

Be right back guys, gotta run to the store!

Free Jiffy Muffin Mix & 3 Musketeers Bites


Today’s Freebie Friday is a tad late thanks to my inexplicable ability to break two industrial strength dryers. I swear the first one was already jammed with quarters when I got there, but the owner didn’t smile when the second one simply stopped 5 minutes into warming my undies. I was just happy to have been sitting far away on the opposite side of the room when it happened.

As for the freebies, it looks like SavingStar is offering free Jiffy corn muffin mix while Kroger is loading free 3 Musketeers Bites to our cards.

Free Ovaltine Drink Mix

Free Ovaltine Chocolate Drink Mix

I believe you need to have children in your household to qualify for today’s free Ovaltine chocolate drink mix. While I don’t have any kids myself, there are some who live in my apartment building. That makes us one big happy family, right? What’s that old saying: It takes a village to qualify for an Ovaltine sample? Something like that.

Free Candy & Pot Pies

Free Mike & Ike's Candy

Didn’t SavingStar’s free Mike & Ike’s candy go through an ad campaign recently where “Mike” went “missing?” Looks like they located him without much fanfare. So where the heck was he? My guess is they found him after a rough month in Tijuana.

Also Kroger is offering a free Marie Callender’s Pot Pie for their customers.

Free Krispy Kreme Doughnut

Free Krispy Kreme Talk Like Pirate

Friday, September 19 is National Talk Like A Pirate Day and what’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of pirates? Buried treasure, obviously. But what’s the second? Grog, duh. How about the third though?! Swashbuckling sword fights without a doubt.

Unfortunately none of those are free tomorrow, but the 198,344th thing you associate with pirates is: free Krispy Kreme donuts! If you simply talk like a pirate, you’ll receive one free glazed donut. However if you walk in wearing at least three of the items below, you’ll get a free dozen glazed donuts!

  • Eye Patch **
  • Pirate Hat
  • Pirate Flag (Black or Red) **
  • Bandana
  • Peg Leg
  • Parrot on Shoulder **
  • Pirate Shirt / Loose white shirt
  • Knickers
  • Leather belt
  • Silver and gold necklaces and earrings
  • Pirate Hook **
  • Pointy black boots or ragged brown sandals

You can print any items with ** via Krispy Kreme’s site, so no need to raid the kid’s Halloween costumes box.