Freebies and free stuff

EDIT: Dead as a … uh … something that’s dead.

This free 5-Hour Energy should arrive at our doorstep in the next five hours. That’s how it works, right? Because I’m really dragging today. I even tried eating raw coffee grinds in order to get the caffeine in my system faster, but my body seems to have rejected it.

This free Lipton green tea comes around at a great time as I apparently got a little too happy on New Years Eve and now have a cold. Thanks a lot, 2011!

You should get a confirmation page with a message “expect your sample in the mail.” Where else would I expect to find it?

The last thing I need is a coupon for a free Arby’s Jr. Jamocha shake. I’m looking at forty straight meals of salads as the only way to balance out the amount of cookies I’ve eaten this week.

Upon liking them on Facebook, you’ll receive a free BiProUSA whey protein sample pack. I don’t “work out” in the traditional sense, but this will be perfect for my custom daily routine. Lugging all those freebies from the mailbox to my room takes a lot out of me.

I thought with working out more that I would have more suppliments and eat more. Sadly? I find myself counting calories and watching what I’m eating even more. So while I thought originally I might get much use out of these two free Quest bars? I have a feeling that I’ll just spend 15 more minutes on the treadmill to justify them…

Goob Says: This offer asks you to like them on Facebook in order to “confirm” your order. To heck with that. I didn’t do it, so I might not get them.

So if you haven’t heard, Burger King has come out with some new formula for their french fries. And that being said, this Friday, December 16th, they’re giving away $1 portions of fries for free.

Of course, I choose the time of year with the free fries, egg nog lattes, and Christmas cookies as the time of year to go on a diet… Meh!

So GNC has this free FortiFX bar coupon. I guess I’d better map out how many GNC’s are nearby and start visiting them all with different mustaches and wigs to maximize this sucker…

Thursday, December 15, is National Cupcake Day. I think we all can agree this should be expanded to a month-long celebration. It looks like both Marble Slab and MaggieMoo’s are getting the ball rolling by offering a free ice cream cupcake from 4-7pm that day. Sweet.

[thanks to aggiegrad for sending this in!]

I haven’t been to a Shoney’s in ages. Why, it makes me think of how I told all of my coworkers out in Seattle how I would stop at every Hardee’s along the way from Illinois straight on through Washington. When I said that, they gave me all blank stares because they’ve always called it Carl’s.

Still, any way that you look at it, this free hot fudge cake slice on December 6th at your local Shoneys is a hot deal. No matter what you call it… Just don’t call me late to getting it!

EDIT: Ugh, what a bungled offer. This is why you don’t announce upcoming freebies.

At 10am EST, you can sign up for a free Mediterranean snack on Facebook. It looks to be a chip or cracker of some sort. Further investigation is certainly needed. It shall be carried out in six to eight weeks during lunch.

This is certain go fast, so good luck.