Hey, It’s Free!

Despite wearing contacts for much of my life, I’ve been lucky enough not to suffer from dry, itchy eyes. So I probably won’t have any use for these free Alaway eye drops from Bausch & Lomb. Or course, the whole problem about not being able to see without contacts kinda even things out, if you ask me. I thought about getting Lasik a while back, but put it off once I realized how expensive it was. I tried shining the laser of one of those red pointer thingies in my eye to see if I could perform the operation myself, but it should come as no shock that I failed miserably.

What I lack in common sense, I more than make up for in stupidity!

[via the forums]

I think we’ve been over the fact that a decent-sized chunk of my family are, unfortunately, vegetarians. I’m still not entirely sure how they got to that point, because I know it doesn’t run in the family blood or anything. I’m pretty sure I could eat a raw horse if I thought it’d taste delicious. So that said, I doubt I’ll be signing up for this free vegetarian starter kit any time soon. I <3 my hamburgers just way too much.

[via the forums]

Crikey! It’s almost Tuesday and we haven’t posted anything since I posted about gaining an hour of sleep?

I guess it just shows that I should definitely sign up for this free sample of Complete Multi-Purpose contact solution. Means I’m not seeing things right by wearing my glasses all the time and not popping in “my eyes,” as I like to call my contacts. Maybe these will come faster than 8 to 12 weeks, just so I can actually see and post more here!

Or… Not.

Okay, I won’t slack this much in the future. But then again, I do have some tests and papers coming up, so you might see more of me…

[via the forums]

Sorry folks, but I don’t think I’m going to be doing a Freebie Reviews for these free Durex condoms anytime soon!

[via the forums]

EDIT: Deadage

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always suffered from massive chapped lips every winter. But as a kid, I didn’t really know what was wrong and thus I always licked my chops to try and sooth them. My mom finally spotted me doing so one day and after a quick inspection, pulled into the nearest pharmacy parking lot and told me to run in and buy something called Carmex. And….

Little Goob: Hi, do you have any Carmex for sale?
Old Lady Behind The Counter: No, sorry son.
Goob: Are you sure? My mom said I could get some Carmex in here.
OLBTC: Trust me, we don’t sell that here. Besides, those things are good for nothing anyway.
Goob: But my lips are really chapped and they hurt! Don’t you have anything I can buy?
OLBTC: How the heck are comics going to help cure your chapped lips?

Luckily for me, I don’t have to go into a pharmacy anymore and spend ten minutes trying to tell people I want Carmex and not comics. Why? Because I can just sign up for this free Carmex lip balm and have it sent straight to me in the mail!

[via the forums and Julie]

Whenever I see a freebee like this one, I have to think “For all of my time on this planet, have I been breathing wrong?” I mean, I must be doing something right if I’m still standing here, but I guess there’s someone who knows better if there’s a free Expert’s Guide to Better Breathing booklet out there.

I guess the bright side to this is that it’s a free guide and it’s not going to cost me anything to learn how to breathe better, but at the same time, what am I supposed to learn? How to breathe underwater like David Blaine? How to breathe icy breath like Superman? Or maybe I’ll learn fire breathing like dragons. That would really be cool…

I swear, this wasn’t the best freebee we had this morning. There were better ones. But you should sign up for the forums for those, and for the September contest…

[via the forums]

I’m not really sure what this free sample from EAS is, but it’s sure to be nothing short of awesome. The company is called Energy-Athletics-Strength, so maybe you’ll just get all three in a bottle. If that’s true, then this would certainly be in the runnings for the greatest free sample ever. Let’s keep our fingers crossed then. (Don’t be too disappointed if you get a sample powder of Myoplex in your mail though.)

Last year in the midst of the cold and flu season, I was working retail. Alright, alright. I was a cashier at a Wal*Mart Neighborhood Market. One of the grocery store versions of Wal*Mart. And even more so, I was the Liquor Clerk.

And while all of that alcohol around me would have been a great antiseptic for my sore throat and would have helped me fall asleep even with my worst headache and stuffy nose–and quite well too, might I add–I just kept drinking a huge bottle of water filled with Airborne alongside sucking on zinc lozenges like they were going out of style. And if you could get past the funky neon greenish color that my water had turned, well, I guess I was pretty normal.

Even still, I learned how awesome Airborne really was. And what’s even cooler is this free Airborne Power Pixies sample they’re giving out right now on their website. It’s the kids version of the stuff, so to make it the “hip thing” for the kids, there’s no water needed and you pour it right on your tongue. Its like a medicinal Pop Rocks!

And better than that, because it’s made for kids, you know it’s bound to taste good. Because, well, even though my water was neon green? Let’s just say that you had to pair the taste with the color…

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free, airborne, neon green, kids, pop rocks

Chances are if you have a little one, you’ve already got a few diapers on hand. But you can never have too many. Trust. Me. On. That. We won’t get into the specifics, but let’s just say the end of this little episode involved myself, my little brother Colton, a beach towel, and a bunch of paperclips. Oh, what I would have done for some of these free pampers diapers back then!

[via Barry and Pru]

Technorati Tags: wal mart, pampers, diapers,

The first thing I think of when I see a freebee for a patch is the astronauts up on the shuttle sewing the hole in the heat shield right now.

But when you’re in space, you don’t have any weight really on your legs or feet, so you really wouldn’t need a free Neru Patch Foot and Leg Discomfort sample.

But a free heat shield patch would be nice for them up there, I’d imagine.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free, patch, foot, leg, shuttle

Tylenol stopped working for me when I was about 10. Advil succumbed a few years later and before I knew it, Excedrin became as effective at curing my migraines as thinking about magic ponies. But then came my discovery of this free Goody’s Orange headache powder and all was right in the world of Goob again. Actually, I’ve never tried the orange flavored kind, but the original is like a magical elixir. Not 15 minutes after taking, my migraines retreat elsewhere and I can finally function again. But I must say, I doubt making it orange flavored will help any with the taste. If you don’t have a giant swig of a tasty beverage nearby, may God have mercy on your soul. I once tried to take the powder just by itself and I think if that situation ever arises again, I’ll just try snorting it.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: Goody’s, migraines, free stuff

Summertime. The one time of the year that our skin goes into overkill. Damn the beach for being so awesome and so perfect for this time of year. Heck, even up in Alaska in Anchorage, I was seeing that it’s supposed to be 65 for the high. I think you could probably go with a bikini or something in that weather, I don’t know. Depends on the wind chill, I’d imagine.

So speaking of summer, I’m about to post my ultimate summer mix-tape on the boards (Did I mention you should register, because even though Undrallio lost the challenge, he shaved his head because YOU didn’t register, dear reader? Well, feel bad for the kid and register and offer him your condolences). And what better thing to listen to while laying out in the sun…

And after you come in from the glorious 38 minutes that this tape clocks in at, you should really rub something on that sunburnt skin, something like this free Eucerin Calming Creme sample (finally the darn freebee link, eh?). Soothe all of that reddened sun burnt skin… Oh, and if you have a good sunburnt photo of yourself, send it our way! Goob’s e-mail address is on this page, and he likes hearing from people. But don’t tell him I sent you…

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: summer, free, eucerin, creme, mixtape, hair, undrallio, bald, redness, forums

At work, I keep a bottle of water by me at all times. Usually, it’s a 1.5 liter sized Fiji water bottle that I refill with tap water. Seeing I spend 8 hours jockeying a register, I figure it doesn’t hurt to have something to do, so I drink water. Tons of it. I usually drink 4.5 liters over the course of those hours.

Come cold and flu season and the summers when you need to stay hydrated, it’s really good to do this. But when everyone around you is sick? Well, that’s when it’s Airborne time for those 4.5 liters. I swear by the stuff, and it draws funny looks from the customers. Especially when I’m in the liquor store.

So imagine, allergy season this year? As bad as it might sound, I think that Airbornes going to help, and it’s time to try with a free sample of Airborne Seasonal.

Sounds like a winner to me.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free, airborne, allergies, water

This free Nasal Cease is supposed to help stop nosebleeds quickly. This is probably a better remedy than the one I used while growing up. My Dad always used to just stick a pencil behind my ear, tilt my head up, and tell me to walk it off. I’m not quite sure where the medical science is behind his method, but I didn’t know any better to question it. Luckily for everybody, my mom was home when my little brother broke his arm.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: free, nosebleeds

I’m only posting this free Dentek floss picks so that my dentist will finally get off my back. The last time I was in his office, I’m pretty sure he put me under for a few days just to get back at me for not flossing all these years. Knowing me though, I’ll probably just let this freebie sit in the corner and gather dust, right next to my treadmill and that set of kitchen knives I bought that can cut through a leather shoe.

[via the forums]

Technorati Tags: freebie, floss, dentist, teeth, cavities